Dating seems to be the topic that people want to hear about. I have a friend who told me I should start a "dating chronicles" blog but I never did. I have so many stories, from so many guys, I can't even keep them straight. I have kind of given up on dating, or at least the online dating. I want to find a man not online, cause you can be whoever you want online and that's not working for me.
So, just for shits, here are some of my amazing dating stories.....
I'm on my way to meet a guy at a park for some casual conversation. First meet. He runs out of gas on the way and asks me to get him gas and meet him on Bangerter. Um, no. I made him walk to the gas station, so I could scope him out before he got in my car. He was decent, and didn't seem like a rapist, so I took him back to his car to fill up and went to the park with him. We ended up going on a second date (huge mistake). When it was time for the check, dude says "two checks please!" Let me just point out that we went to Buffalo Wild Wings, on boneless Thursday, I got 8 boneless wings. My meal wasn't even $6! A few weeks after I had the "it's just not going to work, we're looking for two completely different things" chat he messages me online and says that he wants to go to BWW, just as friends of course. I reply with "what would be the difference between this time and last time? I would pay for myself either way." Bam! That's a point on the board for Katie!!
This guy and I start talking, actually having a normal conversation. Guy actually acts interested, like he wants to get to know me. Of course, sex gets brought up. I told him that I don't have sex with people on the first meet and I like to get to know people. He says okay and continues chatting. He then asks me to come out to see him that night and the next night (he lives in Ogden, mind you). I say that I'm busy, it's a bad week, etc.... and "I'm not having sex with you." He tells me I'm stubborn, I say I know, and that's that. We continue chatting (if I don't respond within 30 minutes I get a "hello" or "??" text.... needy much?). He tries to get me to come up again, and I tell him I'm busy. He gets mad. I tell him that he gets angry that I'm stubborn but it's because he doesn't like my answers. He replies with "then change your answers." Ha! Really!? I give the whole speal that I have a life, that doesn't revolve around him, etc and he responds with "peace bitch." Really dude? Thank you for helping me realize you're a waste of my time before actually wasting my time.
**all time favorite** I've been chatting with this guy for a couple of weeks. He lives in St. George and travels up to SLC about once or twice a month. We decide to go get dinner. I'm eating a turkey club sandwich and drinking a water. Dude says to me, "Well, my ex is skinnier than you, but you're pretty, so you've got that going for you." I am at a loss for words, loss. I have NO idea what to say, bro caught me completely off guard. He then proceeds to say, "I think you've had enough to eat, are you going to finish that?" I then shoved my turkey club in my mouth in the most disgusting way imaginable, even though I was no longer hungry at this point. He walks me out to my car and asks me if I plan on coming back to his hotel with him..... Really? What gave it away that I wanted to have sex with you AFTER you called me fat. Am I that transparent!?
I didn't actually meet this guy, but I totally got "Catfished." (if you don't know what I'm talking about, it's a show on MTV, google it.). Chatting with this handsome boy, nbd. He wants to meet. Doesn't give me his phone#, says he can't text on his work phone, instead he gives me an email address. He sends me a picture and dude looks nothing like he does on his profile. I'm showing my friend at work his picture, telling her that we're hanging out on Wednesday and I don't know what to think cause the pictures don't match up. She asks for his name, we'll call him Joe. She swears up and down that his name is Kevin. She leaves and comes back and shows me this picture of this guy on FB named Kevin. Joe is stealing dude's facebook pics and pretending they are his own! I called "Joe" out on this and he just totally blew it off, "we share this account" blah blah blah. Well funny story. Kevin is GAY. I have 3 co-workers that can attest to this, really bro? Do your research before you steal people's pics.
My favorites are the dudes who talk to you for 3 seconds and then ask you to send them a picture. Do the 8 pictures on my profile not work for you? Oh wait, you're looking for a topless picture of some sort? That's what porn sites are for, or myspace, they're free and you don't have to ask for them.
Don't call me "hun" or "babe" or "sweetheart" 10 seconds into our first conversation. I'm not going to like you more, I'm just going to be more annoyed with you. My mistake is hanging out with those dudes. Cause when they say "I just wanna cuddle hun" they mean "I want to cuddle with my clothes off and my dick inside you." We are NOT on the same page, and that just makes things awkward.
If I tell you before we meet that I'm NOT going to have sex with you, I don't care how many drinks you try to put in me we are still NOT going to have sex. I will say no, I will push your hand away, I will then resort in telling you I'm on my period (even when I'm not) just so you get the picture. And if you STILL try at that point.... well, I feel sorry for you.
I swear that men are like parking spots. All the good ones are taken, and the ones that are left are all handicapped. Ugh.
I just want to find a romantic, affectionate man. Someone who sends me flowers just because they're thinking of me. Makes me breakfast in bed. Texts me just to say "hi." Wants to hold my hand or have their hand around me when we're together. A man who calls me "beautiful" and "gorgeous" instead of "sexy" or "hot." They can have a conversation with me and look me in the eye, not at my chest. Someone to tell me about their day, and wants to hear about mine.... and actually listens. Does this guy exist? Am I asking for too much? Dating in Utah tells me that I am. I haven't met one guy with any one of these qualities, much less one guy with all of them.
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